The New Bob Dylan Song

there’s a rare endangered earthworm that’s just gone extinct
there’s a chicken that’s about to cross the road
there’s a rumor going round 'bout your uncle's mistress
there’s a stranger offering to carry your heavy load
there’s a new kid on the block with a perfect haircut
who says there ain’t no line between right and wrong
he’s aimed a plastic water pistol at my head
while I listen to the new Bob Dylan song

there’s a clown applying his greasepaint in the graveyard
"there’s a time and place for everything", he says
the funeral goers dance and throw confetti
a passing Shriner smiles and doffs his fez
that might be thunder rumbling in the distance
or the low pulse of an ancient temple gong
but none of that can pierce my solid concentration
as I listen to the new Bob Dylan song

a tour bus full of PT Barnum circus freaks
is rolling down the midtown avenues
they point and laugh at office workers passing by
then they scream "you got no right to sing the blues!"
meanwhile way up high, atop the Empire State
swatting airplanes there he is King Kong
i’d go look out the window but i’m busy now
i’m listening to the new Bob Dylan song

the president is sleeping in his presidential bed
his wife's all wrapped up with his Chief of Staff
the governor is knocking back some whiskeys
he and his secret boyfriend share a nervous laugh
and the mayor’s catching up on late night paper work
his secretary’s stripped down to her thong
but my mind is not on on sex, nor even politics
i’m listening to the new Bob Dylan song

deep within the jungle there’s a naked man
he points his arrow toward some jungle beast
his aim is true the arrow meets its target
tonight there’s gonna be a jungle feast
and me i’ll grab some noodles down at the noodle shop
they cook ‘em like they do in old Hong Kong
but even though I’m hungry I can’t go just yet
i’m listening to the new Bob Dylan song

outside the sirens wail, the babies cry, the lovers moan
the birds and butterflies are on the wing
the ghost of Elvis Presley in a ghostly Cadillac
borrows money from the ghost of BB King
a traveling guitar salesman’s at the front door
right on cue the doorbell rings ding dong
but i won’t be needing, no, no new guitars today
i’m listening to the new Bob Dylan song

there’s a demonstration happening down near City Hall
and it’s happy hour at all the nearby bars
half price on Molotov cocktails, two for one
you can toss ‘em at the passing police cars
orangutans and ballet dancers weave their way
all throughout the tear gas shrouded throng
i guess i’ll read about it in tomorrow’s papers
but now I’m listening to the new Bob Dylan song

the midnight train is passing ‘neath the moonlight
it’s bound for someplace better some might say
but anyway, where’ere you go, well there you are my friend
there’ll only be some new landlord to pay
there’s a question on your lips it seems quite urgent
you need a swift reply, you say you can’t wait long
i’ll do my best to answer, oh I swear I will
once I’ve listened to the new Bob Dylan song